life
My entries reflected the meaning of life. Seriously, i haven't realise that from a third-party's point of view. Ya, what was i thinking? I blogged about happiness, sadness, disappointment, anger. All these are general feelings of people towards life.
Something happened few weeks back and i was badly affected by it. To be honest, never and i really mean, never in my entire life have i felt like that. And as a result, i lost it. My usual composed-self was lost. I looked fine on the surface. But internally, my mind was in turmoil. All i wanted was time alone. I wanted to be alone. And there i was, back at Singapore River. It has been a year since i last went there. Yes, whenever i am troubled, Singapore River is where you can find me.
To be honest, sitting there for hours doesnt help me to solve my problems. But sitting by the river side brings this serenity and peacefulness in me. And i was somewhat, attracted to the reflection of the moonlight in the river. The current in the river made the reflection swayed. It looked like a snake slithering and really, that image caused me to be in a trance. I suddenly had this crazy thought of jumping into the river for a swim. And please, i ain't committing suicide.
A friend has mentioned before that "University shapes your character". It is so true. Iknow iam not in my best character at the moment. But at least, i have already learn to identify my weaknesses. And prolly, the next step i need to take is to solve my weaknesses. That, in my opinion, is the hardest to fulfil. Having to admit your wrongdoing and changing yourself for a better future ain't easy.
You sometimes apologise to me for not being there in my 21st. Even though that hasn't happen, but i could just sense your absence. Everyday, iam pining with zero hope. Contradicting isn't it? Iam pining but with no hope that you will be there on August 13. You kept telling me that it is something that i don't have a choice. And iam being suay for having a significant other like you. But really, do you really want me to feel this way? That it is my bad luck bumping into you? No sane person wanna feels that!
'I have no choice but to wait for you.' I kept telling myself that i do have the choice. How silly. That was a great lie. I deceived myself totally. To be honest, i really have no choice. Other than your impatience, being sucha' stubborn ox and your over-carefree life, you're my almost perfect partner. Really. What more can i ask for? And iam not even complaining about you being a workaholic.
It is funny on how i end up with guys who are working hard into their careers.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Lastly, just wanna say
I am just me.
I am ashamed to say that,
i don't have a pair of beautiful eyes.
i don't have a fantastic figure.
i don't have the Dove model's silky hair.
I don't have Karen Mok's perfect legs.
All i have is my confidence,
which have been shaken by you.
All i have is me.
who have been struggling to get out of the pit.
Your hands pulled me up.
Yet, it was this very same pair of hands that let me go.
P/s: Yes, after today, let's hope this kind of entry shall never be penned again.
Something happened few weeks back and i was badly affected by it. To be honest, never and i really mean, never in my entire life have i felt like that. And as a result, i lost it. My usual composed-self was lost. I looked fine on the surface. But internally, my mind was in turmoil. All i wanted was time alone. I wanted to be alone. And there i was, back at Singapore River. It has been a year since i last went there. Yes, whenever i am troubled, Singapore River is where you can find me.
To be honest, sitting there for hours doesnt help me to solve my problems. But sitting by the river side brings this serenity and peacefulness in me. And i was somewhat, attracted to the reflection of the moonlight in the river. The current in the river made the reflection swayed. It looked like a snake slithering and really, that image caused me to be in a trance. I suddenly had this crazy thought of jumping into the river for a swim. And please, i ain't committing suicide.
A friend has mentioned before that "University shapes your character". It is so true. Iknow iam not in my best character at the moment. But at least, i have already learn to identify my weaknesses. And prolly, the next step i need to take is to solve my weaknesses. That, in my opinion, is the hardest to fulfil. Having to admit your wrongdoing and changing yourself for a better future ain't easy.
You sometimes apologise to me for not being there in my 21st. Even though that hasn't happen, but i could just sense your absence. Everyday, iam pining with zero hope. Contradicting isn't it? Iam pining but with no hope that you will be there on August 13. You kept telling me that it is something that i don't have a choice. And iam being suay for having a significant other like you. But really, do you really want me to feel this way? That it is my bad luck bumping into you? No sane person wanna feels that!
'I have no choice but to wait for you.' I kept telling myself that i do have the choice. How silly. That was a great lie. I deceived myself totally. To be honest, i really have no choice. Other than your impatience, being sucha' stubborn ox and your over-carefree life, you're my almost perfect partner. Really. What more can i ask for? And iam not even complaining about you being a workaholic.
It is funny on how i end up with guys who are working hard into their careers.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Lastly, just wanna say
I am just me.
I am ashamed to say that,
i don't have a pair of beautiful eyes.
i don't have a fantastic figure.
i don't have the Dove model's silky hair.
I don't have Karen Mok's perfect legs.
All i have is my confidence,
which have been shaken by you.
All i have is me.
who have been struggling to get out of the pit.
Your hands pulled me up.
Yet, it was this very same pair of hands that let me go.
P/s: Yes, after today, let's hope this kind of entry shall never be penned again.
|11:41 PM|